Weather 
Forget a slugfest, this was a yuckfest.
Everybody knows New York is a funny city. For proof, just walk outside.
But on Wednesday night, things got downright competitive beneath Chelsea Market at The Stand West, where five comedians went head-to-head in a battle for borough supremacy.
The occasion: a showdown at the New York Comedy Festival, with Brooklyn, Queens, Manhattan, the Bronx and Staten Island each sending a representative to settle once and for all which corner of the Big Apple has the best sense of humor.
Let the games begin.
Round 1: Queens.
Representing the borough was Jessica Levin, a blue-collar comedy queen with the frenetic energy of a New York City subway platform at rush hour.
The daughter of a sanitation worker, Levin had the audience in stitches with the kind of observations that can only come from a lifetime spent in the five boroughs.
“My mom’s from Chelsea, but she grew up in a different Chelsea,” she cracked onstage. “She didn’t grow up with Tim, Tim and their dog Tim who live in a 5.2 million dollar condo. She grew up in a methadone clinic-Puerto Rican-shantytown-Irish Chelsea.”
Later, Levin deftly took some risky shots (that were well received) at the city’s diversity.
Next up: Brooklyn. Bringing a healthy dose of fuggedaboudit attitude to the proceedings was Gastor Almonte.
The co-host of the comedy podcast War Report, Almonte hails from East New York, Brooklyn, and wasted no time reminding the crowd that not everyone has ventured into his neck of the woods.
“For those of you who haven’t been there before… keep it going! You’re doing great,” he began his raucous set, where he skewered relationships to his artistic daughter.
“My daughter is a visual artist. Last year, she had one of her paintings displayed at MoMA,” he announced, drawing applause. “I did two shows at a laundromat this week. Our careers are going in different directions.”
The packed crowd erupted.
Stepping into the ring next was Bronx bomber, Adrienne Iapalucci.
An uptown native, Iapalucci is known for her no-holds-barred approach to comedy, with a set that ventured into some decidedly dark territory, including suicide.
It’s little wonder she’s earned a champion in Louis C.K., who directed her 2024 Netflix special, aptly titled The Dark Queen.
“I’ve lived in New York City my whole life and never had a good day,” she announced by way of introduction. And she wasn’t about to get any sunnier from there.
The audience alternated between cackling and recoiling as Iapalucci unleashed one dark punch line after another.
Coming up next: representing underdog Staten Island was stand-up comedian Eric D’Alessandro.
Erroneously introduced as “David,” D’Alessandro wasted no time making a clever meal of the mix-up. It’s no wonder: offstage he’s built a sizable following with his comedy videos on Instagram, where he boasts nearly a million followers.
On Wednesday night, most of his material centered on life as a young dad — a relatable topic that had many in the audience nodding in agreement between giggles.
“My wife wanted to come tonight, but she said, ‘Only I can do his routine.’ What is our son, a Rockette?” he joked, drawing big laughs from the crowd.
And last but not least, flying the flag for mighty Manhattan in the final round was Oscar Aydin.
Host of the pop culture podcast Sit’N B!tch, Aydin skewered his status as a gay man in New York as the crowd howled with delight.
“I love straight people, but you have a lot of time on your hands,” he said. “I came across this article: 23 Things Straight People Think are Very Gay and I gotta tell you: I was shocked to find out breakfast was gay.”
Drawing belly laughs throughout his set, Aydin eventually turned his attention to politics. It looked as though things might take a problematic turn, but, much to everyone’s surprise, the crowd was in stitches.
After plenty of hootin’ and hollerin’, it was time for the judges to crown a champion.
Caroline Hirsch, founder of the New York Comedy Festival and longtime owner of the now-shuttered Midtown comedy institution Caroline’s, joined the judging panel alongside George Stephanopoulos, a producer at Saturday Night Live honcho Lorne Michaels’ production company, Broadway Video, and Raphael Espinal, whom Mayor Mamdani appointed commissioner of the Mayor’s Office of Media and Entertainment earlier this year.
After a tense deliberation, the judges stunned the crowd: they were deadlocked. The field was down to two — D’Alessandro and Aydin — and the audience would decide the winner with its cheers.
By the end of the night, there was no doubt. Manhattan’s own Oscar Aydin had won.
“It was an honor to represent Manhattan and be part of this,” Aydin, whose grand prize included proceeds from the venue and a headline show at Stand West, told The Post.
“I just kind of do my comedy. I don’t worry about what the people think. I worry about what makes me happy and brings me joy. And if the people in the audience like it, they like it, and if they don’t, they don’t.”
Meanwhile, D’Alessandro took his runner-up status in stride.
“Performing for my kids and general audiences are very similar,” D’Alessandro told the Post. “For both, it depends on the subject matter and whether they’ve eaten and are cranky.”
He still considered the results a win.
“Onstage, there was zero pressure on me. Staten Island is an underdog. We’re not gonna get the recognition, and we like it that way.”
