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DEAR ABBY: My fiance and I often talked about maybe getting a dog. He really wanted one, but I never fully committed because I knew it would be additional work and responsibility I don’t have time for. I work full time, do part-time work as well and manage the household tasks, shopping, cleaning, etc. When I ask him to pitch in, he always does, but I’m at max capacity with work.
Not long ago, he asked me to go look at dogs. I agreed but only to look. When we arrived, I told him and the dog owner that the puppies looked very sweet but added that we were just not ready. I reiterated this several times, but my fiance placed the money on the counter despite my objections and now we have a dog, “Butch.”
Fast-forward: Butch is a sweet, loving pup. I adore him, but he’s a ton of work. My fiance is back in school and working so he’s not happy stopping multiple times a day to take Butch out for air and exercise as the dog is an active breed. He does it, but some days are stressful for us both.
Abby, I resent him for this. We’re both overloaded and now have another full-time responsibility plus extra bills. We love Butch but are overwhelmed. I would be miserable giving him away, which is what my fiance now suggests.
We treat Butch well. We love him and give him the best of everything, and he is sensitive and sweet. I don’t think another person or family would treat him as well, and I would be sick with worry if he weren’t here. We paid for daycare and walks; that helped immensely, but we can’t afford it anymore. What do I do? — PET PROBLEM IN MARYLAND
DEAR PET PROBLEM: Why do you think another family would not appreciate Butch and treat him as well as you have? If he is sensitive and sweet, is housebroken and has been taught basic manners during the time he has been with you, he might find a very loving home — hopefully one with children he can play with.
Contact pet rescue groups in your area and explain the situation, and you may be pleasantly surprised. And the next time your fiance pulls his money out and puts it on the counter when you have told him you don’t want something, tell him to put it back.
DEAR ABBY: Our new neighbors have been out of town for several weeks, and their newspapers keep piling up outside their home. We don’t know them well enough to have their contact information to ask if they need help with the newspapers. At what point can we pick them up and place them in our recycling bin? — MINDFUL NEIGHBOR
DEAR NEIGHBOR: Newspapers piled in front of a house are like an invitation to an open house. Your neighbors should have called the newspaper before they left and told them they wanted their newspapers held until they returned. It would be kind of you to pick the papers up and save them for your neighbors rather than dispose of them.
Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Contact Dear Abby at DearAbby.com or P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.
