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With the holidays around the corner, half of Americans have already mapped out their conversation survival “game plan” (50%).
A new survey of 2,000 adults 21 and older found that while some are finding solace in wine, others are finding the kids’ table more appealing than ever (47%), especially millennials (62%).
The survey explored how different generations are feeling the same pressure of navigating awkward conversations at the holiday table and revealed the different ways each peer group keeps things light.
While each has its own opinions on the matter, the generations can all agree that some topics don’t have a seat at the table: politics (42%), finances (28%) and comments on appearance or weight (26%).
Questions like “How’s your diet going?” “Who did you vote for?” and “Can I borrow money?” were among the most commonly cited conversation culprits.
Looking at how they navigate these tricky talks into friendlier chats, respondents are still pulling the classics — faking a phone call or making a quick dash to the restroom. But many stay put and lean into lighter conversational fare: food and wine.
The survey commissioned by St. Francis Winery & Vineyards and conducted by Talker Research found that despite their differences, food and wine is the favored topic to talk about across ages (48%), followed by a desire to discuss their social lives (36%), travel plans (33%), hobbies (32%) and health (24%).
“What stood out to me in this research is that people aren’t shying away from connection — they’re just getting smarter about how to have it,” said Chris Louton, winemaker at St. Francis Winery. “Food and wine give us something to gather around. They break the ice, invite curiosity and make space for conversations that actually bring us closer — awkward moments and all.”
More than digging into divisive topics, nearly half (48%) said they’d rather chat about hot takes on wine, for example.
Staying curious about simple joys like food (90%), wine (77%) and hobbies (73%) are some of the most popular ways to spark conversation and connection.
While wine lovers span every age, taste preferences can still spark some friendly tension: for example, Gen Z is nearly five times as likely to enjoy wine cocktails during the holidays as baby boomers (29% vs. 6%).
Other playful debates include putting ice in wine (28%), bringing a budget bottle to dinner (23%) or chilling a red (18%). Gen Z (23%) and millennials (25%) are also more likely to be enthusiastic about someone using wine as a mixer.
Some even credit their favorite pour with helping set the tone: wine cocktails (15%) and other festive pours were seen as top mood boosters that help take the edge off an awkward moment.
Outside of food and wine, finding common ground — especially with younger family members — can be tricky, as different interests and conversation styles can get in the way.
Most respondents report relating best to others their own age (82%), with baby boomers especially feeling that sense of camaraderie (88%). For example, boomers are especially tuned in to family updates (31%), while Gen Z is excited to share their goals for the new year (24%).
“Everyone brings something different to the table,” said Camille Lunt-Bisbey, director of consumer sales and marketing at St. Francis Winery & Vineyards. “Being curious — especially about what matters to someone else — is what turns small talk into something more meaningful.”
To keep things light, Gen Z (67%) and Gen X (75%) will gladly keep conversation flowing about their hobbies (67%). Millennials also enjoy chatting about travel plans and their pets or animals (76% each) alongside baby boomers (64%).
Even when conversations get a little bumpy, many agree it’s worth it. Six in 10 said the awkward moments often lead to a deeper understanding of the person across from them.
Nearly two-thirds of those surveyed said they learn more about loved ones during the holidays than any other time of year (63%) — with 78% agreeing those conversations are even better over a shared meal.
What is the one question you don’t want to be asked this holiday season?
– “Do you have a girlfriend?”
– “So, when are you going to lose those holiday pounds?”
– “Who did you vote for?”
– “What did you do to your hair?”
– “When do you think you will go back to work?”
– “Why won’t you go to church with us?”
– “When are you getting your life together?”
– “How’s your diet going?”
– “When are you getting married or having kids?”
– “Are you OK since your husband died?”
– “How much are you making now?”
– “Are you really happy?”
– “Why don’t you join an online dating site?”
– “How come you haven’t come to visit?”
– “How are you doing financially?”
– “What do you do every day now that you’re retired?”
– “What is your job now?”
– “How is your transition going?”
– “So, what are your plans for the future?”
– “Can I borrow money?”
What Americans don’t want to talk about this holiday season
– Politics — 42%
– Finances — 28%
– Appearance/weight — 26%
– Religion/spiritual beliefs — 23%
– Previous romantic relationships — 21%
– Mental health — 18%
– Work/career — 14%
– Personal goals/struggles — 14%
– Current relationship status — 12%
– Other family members — 10%
Research methodology:
Talker Research surveyed 2,000 Americans 21+ who drink wine who have access to the internet; the survey was commissioned by St. Francis Winery and administered and conducted online by Talker Research between Oct. 21 and Oct. 27 2025. A link to the questionnaire can be found here.
