DEAR ABBY: Six years ago, at my 40th high school reunion, a few former classmates asked me about my old high school sweetheart. (We broke up after high school.) I decided to find her and located her on Facebook. To my surprise, she never married. I told her I am married. We became friends again, but from 3,000 miles away.
For a few years, it was a nice friendship. We shared old stories, and I helped her out with financial stuff and gave her some emotional support. Recently, she told me she has a long-distance relationship with an “oil rig offshore worker.” I asked her to tell me more about him, and it all points to a scam artist. I recognized all the signs and tried to warn.
She insists he’s real, it’s true love and they are getting married. (They have never met in person.) Then I got an email from her with some nasty words about my comments. I told her I care for her safety and that the man she’s corresponding with is NOT real — it’s a romance scam.
I no longer hear from her. I still care about her even though it’s not a high school romance anymore. What should I do? — SWEETHEART IN CALIFORNIA
DEAR SWEETHEART: Unfortunately, romance scams like the one you have described are common. The scammer claims to be on an oil rig or in a war zone (but rotating home soon) or is otherwise unreachable in person. He may also have a motherless child he is not parenting on a daily basis because his wife is “dead” and the kid is in “boarding school,” so the target would not be responsible for child-rearing. (How convenient!)
Predictably, an “emergency” arises, and the scammer asks the target to fork over hundreds, or perhaps thousands, of dollars “for a short time only.” After the money is sent, poof! The scammer is gone, and the romance is over.
My advice to you is not to be surprised to hear from her once the con has come to its conclusion.
DEAR ABBY: My husband and I are in our 60s. When we are at home, just the two of us, he likes to wear just his underwear around the house, whether it’s watching TV or eating dinner. I have accepted it all these years and never made an issue of it.
When our granddaughter visited us at the age of 1, he wore shorts at my request but no shirt. She’s now coming to stay with us at age 2 1/2. Don’t you think he should wear a shirt and shorts when she visits? He values your opinion. — MR. INFORMAL’S WIFE
DEAR WIFE: Since your husband values my opinion, please tell him I said that unless it’s 95 degrees when your granddaughter visits, the appropriate thing to do would be to wear shorts and a shirt during your grandchild’s visit.
Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Contact Dear Abby at http://www.DearAbby.com or P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.
